These are our co-operative members and those of us with children, collective experience when we feel disturbed; 

Q. Do I relate to some or all of these?

  • We have felt the depth of pain, suffering and confusion, sensing something isn't right.

  • No matter how hard we try, communicate, or change ourselves, we and others tend to shut out or shut us down when we need, want, think, feel, express, or do things differently.

  • We have felt disappointed and disconnected, often exposed to violence when we say YES when we need to say NO.

  • Pretending, masking or thinking we're okay when we're not—doing things we want to be suitable when it's not.

  • We try to mix in and keep up with everyone and everything to avoid confrontation, criticism, misunderstanding, shame, rejection, and abandonment to keep safe and included. 

  • ​We were doing right and good things for others, our beloveds or society. However, succumbing to doing TOO MUCH, meeting expectations and demands harmed us, and we lost our way.

  • When we cannot or will not do the same as everyone else, often misunderstood as "lazy", "annoying", "sick", "crazy", wrong and bad. We often thought, "there must be something wrong with me". So we naturally engaged in 'fixing, changing, curing ourselves to fit' devaluing and dismissing our magnificent and unique selves to protect ourselves.

  • We often blame ourselves for beloveds and society who struggle with differences.

  • We have felt misunderstood, not heard, misinterpreted, pressured, and bullied by beloveds in our friendship circles, family, learning spaces, social – self-help groups, organisations, online platforms, professionals, services, and institutions.

  • We want to know; ourselves more deeply, our worth and value to our world, transform beliefs that no longer serve us well, find answers beyond our reach, be at peace with ourselves, pre-empt, prepare and protect ourselves from violations, and be proud of who we are in the way we do things.