• an anonymous roarheart

ANGER KILLS LOVE

Updated: May 2, 2019

It's human to feel angry.


It's human to express anger.

Like kick the clothes basket.

Or,

Scream alone in the car.

Having an autistic neurology, I have no defence against the internal buildup that happens.

I am responsible for monitoring my internal being.

Prevention is better than cure.

I do allow myself to be angry.

Screaming in the car doesn't hurt the car.

However when my anger is directed to hurt, intimidate, manipulate, dominate or control this is harmful.

Especially to my autistic child who is very sensitive to vocal tones.

Very sensitive to others anger.

It shuts them down.

It triggers Fight Fright or Freeze

Anger triggers their trauma.

I know because whenever I have a tone my child knows and let's me know.

It's annoying however it's really good that they do because I can say what I mean and mean what I say without saying it mean.

I'm the adult.

Who is meant to be leading by example especially for a child who requires demonstration.

A child who needs compassion and understanding.

It's really good my child can speak up when they feel frightened.

I never could as a child.

I was abused as a child.

I never said anything to anyone.

And anger shut me down.

Anger killed my voice.


And my anger lost my child's trust.

For my child to have a voice;

To talk to me about all sorts of things.

Things I never did with my parents.

I am to be a safe human.

Anger Kills Love.

And


Love grows trust.

Trust gives voice to children.

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ACKNOWLEDGMENT

TRADITIONAL OWNERS

We acknowledge the Traditional Custodians of the land on which we work and live and recognise their continuing connection to land, water and community. We pay respect to Elders past, present and emerging.

OUR AUTISTIC/NEURODIVERGENT CULTURE

​We acknowledge our LBGTIQ2KA+kin autistic/neurodivergent humans.

 

We use identity-first language, "I am autistic", opposed to "I'm a person with autism", reflecting Autism at the core of our identity, that Autism is a Spectrum, a part of neurodivergence and not a disorder. We radically embrace and celebrate neurodivergence.

 

Authoritarian and conforming learning and approaches such as ABA or Applied Behaviour Analysis, treatment or cures, ableism or functioning labels are harmful to both FAN and their child neurodivergent neurologies.

 

AFFILIATED DISCLAIMER

 

ROARHEART™ makes no recommendations nor has any opinions about or is responsible for the content or deficit language of neurodivergence on sites and links that are external to ROARHEART™. The language that describes neurodivergent neurologies and life experiences as disordered, defective or that to be "fixed, changed and cured" is offensive and harmful to FAN and their child.

It is strongly recommended that medical, psychiatric and other therapeutic advice or treatment can only be given by suitably trained and accredited professionals. ROARHEART™ is not a substitute either inferred or directly to replace any form of treatment participants are currently engaged in. We further suggest that prior to making any changes to current treatment participants discuss this with the practitioner that prescribed the treatment or at least get a second opinion from a suitably qualified and accredited clinician. We cannot do this we are not qualified.

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