• an anonymous roarheart


My child's soap sculpture

Made in the shower

Without formal training

Learnt this from a Youtuber

And oh my gosh

What I see in this sculpture?

Two faces!

I see a soap face

And it looks ... Ugly?



The way my child looks

When their brain is struggling

When told, 'No' 'Not now'


Too much activity

Too much noise

Too much light

Too much touching

Too much movement

Too many things to do at once

Too much inspiration

Too many ideas

Too many people talking

Too many demands

Too many requests

Too many expectations


Others see the upset face

I see the beautiful silhouette

Beside the soap

A perfect child

With a tricky mind

That struggles with things

Most minds do not

Other minds subconsciously work all that shit out naturally


But not our minds

They are different

Our body language means different

I see a beautiful perfect child

I see a face

Communicating to me

They need help

Not discipline

Not scolding

Not dominating

Not forcing


Because my child's brain has no defence against the things

It struggles to do

That most brains do easily

My child needs assistance to work out;

'What do I need to be okay?


Alone time

One person talking at one time

One activity at a time

A list of the ideas they have in their head

A list of things they'd like to do

Help to do something

Demands removed

Expectations removed

Requests removed




A shower

A cuddle

Someone to listen

Someone to embrace their difficulties

Their disabilities

It is how we are

And it's okay

We'll get through this tricky moment


If you like me to xxx

#Roarheart #24/7Carer #24/7AutisticCarer #neurodivergence #Autism #Internalising #Difficulties #Behaviourinterpretation #Autisticsupport #Lovenotdiscipline #Understandingnotpunishment

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​We acknowledge our LBGTIQ2KA+kin autistic/neurodivergent humans.


We use identity-first language, "I am autistic", opposed to "I'm a person with autism", reflecting Autism at the core of our identity, that Autism is a Spectrum, a part of neurodivergence and not a disorder. We radically embrace and celebrate neurodivergence.


Authoritarian and conforming learning and approaches such as ABA or Applied Behaviour Analysis, treatment or cures, ableism or functioning labels are harmful to both FAN and their child neurodivergent neurologies.




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