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PHONE OR NOT A PHONE THAT’S THE QUESTION

 

 

I’m told there's a change in me.

 

I shared with my roomie and parent that it seems really coincidental that since I haven’t had a mobile phone, my child has been happier. I experienced the best week I’ve known to have with my child in the two years they’ve been unschooled. They say I’m more relaxed and happier too. My roomie believes because I’m not distracted by the phone my child isn’t distracted. Whenever I take a phone call, my child utilises that opportunity to stop what they were doing to be on screen. My child’s ability to handle exhaustion is better. My child is better able to know when they need downtime either when we’re together or when they were with their friends. So my child’s been less exhausted, more in tune with their needs and happier! 

 

I am really keen to know if this is a fluke or not.

 

I’m going to continue without a mobile phone, for now, at least another week. I want to see what else happens. I’ve noticed I am having more fun with my child. We’ve been playing cowboys and Indians and shooting at one another around the house with nerf poppers. Whenever my child invites me to play, I just play. I realise after a few days of doing this, how much fun we’ve been missing out on together. Having fun is fun and feels really important to our happiness and wellbeing.

 

I’m going to continue having fun with my child.

 

Sometimes, to be honest, I’m reluctant. I think ‘I’ll just finish what I’m doing and then I’ll play’. However, if I leave it too long, my child will give up, and I fear missing out on a beautiful moment together. What’s more important than play when we are kids? I loved playing as a child. It’s a real break from everything. I feel it satisfies a deep need that creates us to do other things, happily.

 

We’ll see!

 

My child wanted to learn how to create animation. Billie searched for an advanced program for free to create animation, involving Minecraft – of course! Lol. Found a Youtuber that has tutorials for the program they downloaded and now Billie is learning how to create animation! Unbelievable! It’s so amazing to watch my child do this all by themselves. To view them learn right in front of me, without any help from me. I got lost on some it, however, Billie worked it out. My mind is quieter, and I feel happier.

 

Can I really go without a mobile phone?

 

If it turns out that my observation is accurate, that my child positively benefits in the way I’ve described, then I feel the only choice is to either have no mobile phone or significantly reduce the use of it in some way. The leading professionals who work with traumatised children say “heal the parent/s you heal the child”. By not having a mobile phone, is that healing me? I find I’m not distracted by incoming phone calls, text messages and all other notifications that are on a mobile phone. I’m not tempted to look for my phone, pick up the phone, use my phone for anything.

 

I feel relaxed because I’m not reachable via the mobile phone.

 

People can still reach me through email, and it doesn’t give me any anxiety, pressure or stress. I find with messages on the phone I’m expected to get back to people quickly. Sometimes I don’t mind getting back to people quickly. However, I mostly enjoy not being needed for anything in a hurry. I really appreciate just being. Just doing. Just finishing what I’m finishing. Just being still. Just being with my child.

 

I’m enjoying my child more without a mobile phone.

 

I’m more easy going. I’m more in tune. I’m more in love with my child.I’m on my computer typing, while my child plays nerf poppers with my housemate. I’m calm, and I’m peaceful while I do this. The computer seems different from a mobile phone. I don’t know why. It feels like I’m on holiday. I don’t get to go on a holiday, so this is a close as I can get. This is the happiest I’ve ever felt. When I had the opportunity to go shopping for some things for my child I felt so grateful to be able to go alone.

 

To go quietly.

 

I looked forward to moving my body around in a shop, with others in my clothes. Yes, my clothes. To feel good in my body, in my clothes. Just feel good. I loved every bit of it. I don’t like shopping. I just loved being. I love this state I’m experiencing, and I want more of it. Can I have more of this? Am I allowed to have more of this? Could I survive without a mobile phone? It feels so good without one! I never thought I’d be the kind of person who’d love not having a phone!

 

Yet the benefits of not having a mobile phone seem undeniable!

 

THANK YOU!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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