THESE ARE UNEDITED, INTIMATE AND NO FLUFF POSTS.
They reveal a kind of humanness that lights a way to remember strengths, truths and answers through unrelenting vulnerability and openness. Born from a desire to live beyond just surviving, masking and going along with things. To strive to revel in our brilliant neurologies. To embrace wholeheartedly who I am – who my child is. There's no more room to wait for loved ones or the world to catch on. WE DON'T HAVE TIME!
An autistics lifespan is between late 30's to 55 years!
Holy Crap! That's my child's life expectancy. This is my life expectancy. This is my friends and family and millions of others life expectancy, and I'm not okay with this. Autism doesn't kill us ... so what does?
It has taken true grit termination and guts I never knew I had.
To follow my intuition and turn my focus away from societies, friends, family's and my own pressures to work out how to support my child and me to KNOW, DIRECT and MASTER OUR LIVES according to OUR INDIVIDUAL needs, wants and desires and MARVEL in our neurologies and discover, recover and create our Families Cultural Innate Flow.
Suicide is one of the main causes of autistic humans.
The truth is, only a few years ago, we both thought death was the only way too. We nearly become a statistic and would not have known why. All I knew what to do at the time was to get typing.
So that's what I did. [ I listened to my Working Innate Flow – I'm a writer ].
I didn't have the time or the want, but I knew I had to. My "brilliant intuitive guide" [intuition] knew writing about my day–to–day living was bigger than me and important work. I worked through my deep pain, emotional and mental torment. I faced layered complexities due to not knowing our neurology or the importance of nurturing, respecting and protecting our Innate Flow in all facets of our lives.
I felt it was important to record my lived experiences in case it could be helpful and it has been, at least for me.
I knew in my heart we were not alone that there was something going on that I just couldn't see or understand. That we had been weighed down by something and if lifted we would discover mysteries beyond our wildest dreams.
It's so incredible how far we have come, HOW MANY FREEDOMS WE NOW ENJOY! How everything now makes sense! The pain, the struggle in our relationships, work, learning and living. I recorded that too!! I still keep typing. There are approximately 300 posts (all identifiers, names, dates etc. changed for anonymity and privacy) ready to be shared. They'll be released throughout the coming months as I am slowly but surely #TAKETHEMASKOFF. [ The published posts have been moved to being included to a new book – hopefully released in 2020 ].
The gems my child and I live by and continue to learn ...
To abandon our "brilliant intuitive guide" that protects, nurtures and shows us how to revel in our brilliant neurology makes us vulnerable to abuse sickness and death. To live up to others expectations exceeds our capabilities and cripples us. To appease and accommodate others demands distract us from mastering our super focus's (special interests). To pressure us to fit into society, to 'normalise us' disconnects us from self–care, regulation, identity, our culture. To correct who we are violates all our personal rights and our Innate Flow.
If I want my child and I to live differently and for my child to live a childhood full of happiness, deep fulfilment and a valued human being– I've got to DO different.
I am to be MY DIFFERENT.
I'm to allow room for and love my child's DIFFERENT. When we do this, we discover wonder, laughter, insight, compassion, understanding, magnificence and brilliance. It's okay to face and give time to our vulnerabilities and embrace grief and loss and all other ugly bits and bobs to find courage and love where we thought there were none. We found an abundance of love. There's is a lot of rip-roaring fun, laughter and freedom to be enjoyed.
So we continue to work at it in our individual ways.
"To pretend that we can get to help, generous and brave without navigating through tough emotions like desperation, shame, and panic are profoundly dangerous and misguided assumption.
we’d be better off learning how to recognise the beauty in
truth and tenacity."
– BRENE' BROWN –
STRETCH _ EMBRACE _ SOAR
Whether I accept this or not, or have a diagnosis or not,
it is still true,
that to be our different we are to do different and follow our
"brilliant intuitive guide".
INTRAPERSONAL CREATIVE QUEST
To love, trust, revel and lead with our beautiful autistic minds
through knowing and acting on our Roarheart
the inner inexplainable knowledge and truth
~ our intuition ~
Reflect and create a picture or journal the answer to;
Have I thought, felt, done or experienced things like this?
Share with another anything discovered in the Sacred Writing/Creating.
Do I follow our"brilliant intuitive guide"?
I pause with quiet reflection upon those moments where I followed or needed to follow our"brilliant intuitive guide".
TODAY’S THANK YOU
I am willing to THANK all my regretful, angry, fearful and negative thoughts I may have.
I will trust, even if I don’t want to, all that I am aware of now, is how it is has meant to be – to be open to something new.
I am willing to put aside everything I think I know about myself/child, my life, my past and my future, to have an open mind and a new experience with I following our"brilliant intuitive guide".
I am open to the possibility of following our"brilliant intuitive guide" to lean into who we really are, our true identities and culture, receiving new thoughts to love, trust, revel and lead with our Roarheart [our inexplainable inner knowledge and truth – our intuition] learning how to know, direct and master our individualised lives.